A Look at Loyalty
Ruth 1:14-17
By Dave Redick
Hwy 20 Church of Christ

The famous Bible Commentator, Matthew Henry, went to London before his publishing days, and met a young lady of the nobility. Despite her wealth and his poverty, the couple fell in love. She went to ask her father if she could marry him and he said, "He’s got no background, you don’t know where he’s come from." She said, "Yes, I know, but I know where he’s going and I want to go with him."

In Edinburgh, Scotland, there is a statue of a small Scottish terrier. On the statue is a plaque that reads, "Back in 1858 the master of the two-year-old dog died. The little puppy followed the funeral procession to the final resting-place of his master. After everyone had gone and the grave had been covered, the little dog crawled to the foot of the grave as if to wait for his master's return. The dog waited and waited through all kinds of weather and unbelievable ordeals. People would capture the dog and take him home, but he always escaped and returned to the foot of the grave of his master to continue his vigil. The dog waited until he died--a span of 14 years."

Loyalty is a rare commodity in today’s world. Employers deplore the lack of it in the workplace. Church leaders grieve its disappearance in churches, and its absence is a major cause of family problems and the diminishing number of long-term marriages.

In the passage we are going to consider this morning, we go back to the time of the judges of Israel. The conquest of Canaan is behind in Israel’s history, the period of the Kings is yet to come. A Moabite woman named Ruth and her Hebrew mother-in-law, Naomi, along with a Moabite sister-in-law share a common grief. Three graves have been dug over a ten-year span. A father and his two adult sons have died. All three women are left widows. Naomi, the mother-in-law, offers the two younger women freedom from the responsibility of staying with her and providing for her. She encourages them to return to their parent’s homes while they are still young enough to remarry. One of them does return. The other, Ruth, does not. Ruth’s beautiful response to Naomi is an expression and demonstration of unwavering loyalty. In this message I want to hold it up before you as an example of something all too rare. Oh, that we could have more of it among God’s people today!

(Read Ruth 1:1-18)

We’re going to zero in on verses 14-17. From these verses I want you to see some important truths about loyalty. While such things used to be understood as a part of that collection of maxims we call "common sense," we’re losing them and they need to be restored.

1. You Cannot Have Loyalty Without Liberty.

Please pay attention, because some of us sitting here this morning don’t understand this.

Look more closely at verse 15: Then she said, "Behold, your sister-in-law has gone back to her people and her gods; return after your sister-in-law."

Notice that Naomi not only did not demand that Ruth stay with her. Rather, in the offer of full freedom, she encouraged her to leave! Would you and I have done that in a similar circumstance? Say we’re in our late 50’s or early 60’s perhaps, with no income and no spouse, not knowing how we will face old age. It would seem that the "natural" thing to do in such a case would be to try in some way to coerce loyalty. "How can you say you love me and leave me like this? You’re some daughter-in-law! When the going gets tough, you bail out!" Naomi understood what we need to know:  Loyalty cannot be demanded, coerced, or purchased.

Clarence Francis, who was chairman of the board of General Foods Corporation, once said: "You can buy a man's time; you can even buy a man's physical presence at a given place; you can even buy a measured number of skilled muscular motions per hour or day. But you cannot buy enthusiasm; you cannot buy initiative; you cannot buy loyalty; you cannot buy devotion of hearts, minds and souls. You have to earn these things."

I must say I agree with that assessment. It is the nature of loyalty.

From time to time people have left the church here and go off to attend some church elsewhere. Usually, they do not announce their departure and, if asked, some superficial sounding reason is given. Some of you have come to me under such circumstances and asked, "Dave, aren’t you going to do something to get them to come back?" My answer has often been this: "What would you have me do? I’ve checked with them to see if they have something against any of us. Their answer was no. When I asked them why they were leaving, they sidestepped or gave a superficial answer. It is obvious they want to leave. Let them go."

"Let them go? Just like that?" That’s right, let them go! Give them the liberty to walk. Why? Because what they lack is loyalty and loyalty cannot be demanded, coerced, or purchased. You can issue ultimatums, you can bark orders, you can pronounce condemnations all day long, but none of these things will produce loyalty in people who do not want to be loyal. They must be given the freedom to depart.

"Do they ever come back?" Often they don’t but that is the risk you must take. Once in awhile, though, such folks realize what they have left and return. At that point they usually commit to stay and you don’t have to constantly worry about them departing because now they are here by their choice.

This is precisely the reason why people with sporadic, non-job-related church attendance don’t listen when we exhort them about the importance of being in the assembly. They are not loyal to Christ or His church. They are loyal to themselves or something else.

This was the issue in John 6 when Jesus preached the Bread of Life sermon. People were following Him because of the food and the miracles. They were interested only in what they could get for themselves. When He spelled out the cost of discipleship, they left Him in droves. Then he turned to his twelve disciples and asked, "Will you go away, too?" In other words, He offered them the freedom to leave with no criticism. At that point they chose to stay with Him.

That is the nature of loyalty. It cannot exist without liberty - the freedom to walk.

Now what I also find interesting is that not only is loyalty not true loyalty if it doesn’t exist in the context of liberty, Liberty is also incomplete without loyalty.

This one is a bit harder to realize, but it is very true. Listen while I try to explain.

What those persons who refuse to be loyal to anything beside themselves usually do is drift. In their conceived "freedom," they go carelessly from one thing to the next to the next. They studiously avoid commitment. They zealously guard their free time and their selfish interests. They form no bonds and no bonds are formed with them. They live for themselves and themselves alone.

That was precisely the case during Ruth and Naomi’s time. Look back at verse one of this chapter. It says, "Now it came about in the days when the judges governed…" What kind of days were those? Judges 21:25 tells us "everyone did what was right in his own eyes."

You see, there were few commitments to the needs of others. People did only what they wanted to do - those things that gratified themselves.

"What’s wrong with that?" you ask. Well, when you live that way, with no bonds or commitments to anyone, no one bonds or commits to you. Yes, you can live that way for awhile and think you’re getting away with your selfishness. If you have good looks or a bit of money to throw around, people will even step in and make you feel like you’re doing just fine. But beauty and bucks are only temporary. So is good health. When your money and looks and your energy are gone, so will be the friends you mistakenly thought were loyal to you. You see it will ultimately catch up. One day you will have a need, and there will be no one around to care for you. One day you will be alone and no one will be there to notice. Uncommitted liberty seems great, but when it exists with no loyalties, it leads ultimately to loneliness and misery.

I’ve seen some prime examples of this. Some church member who never gets involved in the life of the church, never commits to anything, suddenly lands in the hospital facing major surgery. No one comes to visit or show they care. Who do you suppose gets the blame? Why those heartless, uncaring people in the church, of course!

Don’t want to accept my reasoning here? That’s fine. If you are one of those who desire liberty without loyalty, you will. Sooner or later, you will. Sooner or later it will catch up with you. Mark my words. Remember this day when I warned you. It will happen.

You cannot have loyalty without liberty and you cannot have liberty without loyalty. Like Siamese twins, the two are inseparable.

2. You Cannot Put Conditions on Loyalty.

3. You Can't Count on Loyalty Until You Know What a Person Worships.

In verse 16, after saying, "where you go, I will go, and where you lodge, I will lodge. Your people shall be my people," Ruth adds, "and your God, my God."

You see, when we talk about paths, places, and people, we must deal with God, either God (with a capital G) or god (with a small g.) Everybody worships somebody or some thing. Every person on the earth has a God with either a big G or a little g!

What we worship will ultimately determine how we go, where we go, and whom we get involved with.

To some people, their god (little g) is themselves. To others it is their work or their hobby or their boat or their habits. Eventually, who or what this god (little g) is will become evident.

Likewise, for the true Christian, his/her God is the God of heaven (big G.) This will also be evident.

Now here is the rub. The worship of each of these "Gods" leads in a different direction. What you worship makes all the difference in the world as far as direction.

That’s why the Bible warns in 2 Corinthians 6:14, "Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness…What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?"

I have had people ask me, with an incredulous look on their faces, "Dave, do you really think that applies to marriage between believers and unbelievers? It doesn’t mention it." Do you see that little word "partnership?" What do you think that means? Do you see those little words "bound together?" What do they mean?

Believe me, when you’re married, you’re bound together! When you’re married, it is supposed to be a partnership!

Q. What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? A. Not much, because they worship different Gods. On Sunday, she wants to go to church to worship her God and he wants to go to the lake to worship his! On Wednesday, she wants to go pray to her God and he wants to go play at the bar with his.

If you date and marry a non-Christian, that unequal yoke will eventually force you to one of two things: Conflict or Compromise!

Neither one of those is what any thinking person should commit to! Don’t get angry with me when I tell you these things! What I am saying will save you a lifetime of hurt if you listen! The differences in standards and convictions, in lifestyles and values, will eventually cause you misery or else you’ll concede your Biblical standards and break your fellowship with Jesus! Is that what you want?

It’s as someone has said, "If you as a child of God marry a child of the devil, you will eventually have trouble with your father-in-law."

If you commit yourself to a person whose god is money, don't be surprised when he/she spends every waking hour working, is never home, never tuned in to you or family life.

If you commit yourself to a person who sees his/her god in the mirror each morning, don't be surprised if you begin to feel like just another toy.

If you commit yourself to a person whose god is education, get ready to support him/her for the next 40 years as you trek from university to university, adding letters behind your spouse’s name.

If you commit yourself to a person whose god is sports, prepare yourself to spend hours alone as he/she golfs, bowls, bats, kicks, treks to stadiums and camps in front of TV sets.

Ruth saw something valuable in Naomi's worship, she saw something in Naomi's God that was lacking in the idol worship of the Moabites. She was able to say with integrity "Your God will by my God!"

Don’t commit loyalty to a person until you know what he/she worships!

4. You Cannot Put an Expiration Date on Loyalty.

Verse 17 says, "Where you die, I will die, and there I will be buried."

Today, more than ever, we need loyalty that lasts! We need loyalty that stands out in the open and boldly declares, "I bind myself to you in the presence of God and anyone else who cares to listen. God strike me if I ever renig!

So you think that language is too strong?

Look again at verse 17: "Where you die, I will die, and there I will be buried. Thus may the LORD do to me, and worse, if anything but death parts you and me."

Wow! You don’t hear much of that today, do you?

The fourth century bishop, Jerome, once said, "The friendship that can cease has never been real."

In his helpful book, Straight Talk to Men and Their Wives, James Dobson quotes a heart-touching letter his father wrote to his mother before they were married. It reads in part: "I want you to understand and be fully aware of my feelings concerning the marriage covenant which we are about to enter. I have been taught at my mother's knee and in harmony with the Word of God that the marriage vows are inviolable, and by entering them I am binding myself absolutely and for life. The idea of estrangement from you through divorce for any reason at all (although God allows one-- infidelity) will never at any time be permitted to enter my thinking. I'm not naive in this. On the contrary, I'm fully aware of the possibility, unlikely as it now appears that mutual incompatibility or other unforeseen circumstances could result in extreme mental suffering. If such becomes the case, I am resolved for my part to accept it as a consequence of the commitment I am now making, and to bear it, if necessary, to the end of our lives together."

You cannot put an expiration date on loyalty.

When we see loyal determination of that caliber of yesteryear, and are surprised and amazed by it, is it any wonder we are in the mess we’re in?

Conclusion

May God help all of us exhibit the kind of lasting loyalty Ruth exemplifies here for us. May those of us still single take heed to the Word of God this morning, and seek out life-partners who love God with all their heart, soul and strength! And the corollary to that, of course, is to make sure that we ourselves love God with all our heart, soul, and strength.

May those of us here who are married be reminded of our vows that we made before God and our families and friends, and fulfill the promises we made, whether it was last month, last year, 20 years ago or 50 plus years!

May we be loyal to the Lord’s church, not easily shaken loose, not like the church hoppers and worship browsers of today who never make a commitment. The fondest desire I have for such people, if they will not repent, is that they move along - quickly - the sooner, the better. They do no one any good, including themselves and God.

May we be people of lasting loyalty.

Dave Redick is Minister of the Hwy 20 Church of Christ in Sweet Home, Oregon and Editor of The Preacher's Study. He may be reached at pstudysupport@comcast.net.

Copyright © 1996-2008 by The Preacher's Study. Permission is granted to subscribers to use this document in total or in sermon preparation in the context of the local congregation only. Publishing it in a book, on the Internet, or anyplace beyond the local congregation is prohibited.

All Scripture quotations and references are from the New American Standard Version unless otherwise stated.

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